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i was literally about to cry and trying not to pee. this is the best video ever.
honestly. i promise. watch it. please. you’ll love it. seriously.
holy fucking shit
I almost peed my pants. I ran to the bathroom to avoid that fate.
OH MY GOD there are TEARS STREAMING DOWN MY FACE
Mobile gaming is a rising and very popular industry in the gaming scene, it’s origins start with the first I Pods & I Pads making little cheap games that were mainly used for time killers. But now money has come into the mix. Mobile gaming use to be a semi clean industry that was just used for small little games that had an up-front one time payment price. But it ain’t like that anymore!
1: The Apps
I’d like you to take out you’re phone and open the devices app store, what do you see?
Most likely you will see some kind of tower defense game, a few farm simulators, maybe some mobile mmorpg or you may see some kind of exploration game.
All of these games most likely have one thing in common, microtransactions. These seeming harmless in-app purchases are in almost every mobile game even if it’s a free game.
These little transactions allow you to gain some kind of bonus for a small amount of money, some make your crops grow faster, others make a building process go faster, other boost a characters XP so they can become more powerful. Another form of microtransactions is to unlock a locked item that you would have to play the app for a day straight to unlock normally, but don’t worry for only 5.99 you can unlock this anytime you want!
Now I personally don’t mind these if they are used in extreme moderation. (like 1 per app)
But now large mobile developers have found out a way to milk even more money out of people that are playing these games. This thing is called “A pay-wall” This is where the developers of the app intentionally put some event in an app (usually a timer of some sort) to delay a players game play by a few hours.
And of course these are placed in key locations though a game so when a player is enjoying the game they all of a sudden have to stop and either wait for 6 hours or pay $2 to bypass the timer.
I’ll use an analogy to explain this:
(Car = Player | Toll booth=Paywall | Highway = game)
So you are having a lovely drive through the country side speeding along with some friends and you all are having a great time, then suddenly you slam on the breaks because there is a toll station in front of you. A man walks out of the toll both and says to you “Sorry you need to stop here, you are required to pause here for 6 hours.” You and your friends are really bummed out to hear this, so you decide to turn around and go back. Just as your are about to go back the man in the tollbooth says to you, “Wait! You can go through the toll for $20 and you won’t have to wait!”
You and your friends are having fun so you decide to pay the fee and continue on your way.
Then the same thing happens after a few more miles, and again after a few more.
See how this works?
These apps are purposelessly made to “force” you to pay more money to keep having fun. Sadly most people will keep paying and sinking more and more money into the game.
I’ve even seen some apps that require you to pay an upfront fee to get the app, then you have to pay a monthly subscription fee! And you guessed it, the app is packed full of microtransactions!
2: Microtransaction in PC/Console gaming?
Now if you think that all of these microtransactions and stuff in kept to the mobile gaming industry you are sadly mistaken.
Microtransaction are becoming a key part in PC/Console gaming, triple A developers are figuring out that if you put in small little purchases such as a new outfit for your character or a new paint job for your favorite gun people will buy them. So this means you have about $60 for your game plus all the microtransactions this all adds up and they are beginning to corrupt the PC/Console scene.
And sadly developers are putting money over quality with games now, the developers are rolling in cash because they release a new game every year or so but the game is in an unfinished.
Sadly quality is becoming less and less of a goal when developers are making games now and we are ending up with cheap cash in games and shovelware all over the place.
This word “DLC” has become a feared word in gaming, nowadays you will buy a game at it’s full $60 price tag. As you start playing, you look around and you see locked areas on your map, you assume that they will be unlocked after you finish the game so you keep playing. About 6 hours later you have finished the game and the areas still aren’t unlocked so you decide to go to the area to see why you can’t get it. It turns out that there are locked areas of the game that you have to pay money for after you have spent the $60 on the game it’s self.
This is essentially a larger microtransaction just under a different name, DLC.
(think of the pizza as a game)
You order a pizza and pay $20 for it to get delivered $5. After waiting for a while you finally get your pizza delivered, so you head into the kitchen and open the box to find that only half the pizza is in the box. Well you are pretty picked off at this so you call back the pizza place your ordered from and ask them why half the pizza is missing. They respond by saying that additional pizza slices are $5 each.
Your missing 5 pieces so that’s $25. You also notice that there is no dipping sauce so you inquire about that and they say that dipping sauce is $10.
This is what PC/Console gaming is like sadly.
Thankfully unlike mobile gaming you don’t need to pay for these if you don’t want to.
Now most DLC you buy will add like maybe 2-3 hours to your game.
But some developers do it differently.
I’d like to use Gearbox software as an example of this. Gearbox made a game called Borderalnds 2 and it takes about 50 hours to finish the whole game with all side quests. But gearbox decided to expand the borderlands universe by making DLC for Borderlands 2. Now you are most likely thinking oh the DLC is most likely like 2 hours long. Wrong, gear box made DLC that is worth the money because they add 6-8 hours each not counting the side quests.
There are 5 different full DLCs and 5 smaller DLCs.
I hope other triple A developers follow the example of Gearbox DLC strategy because it is the best one I’ve seen.
4: Ingame economy
Now when there is a game that uses a ingame currency there is usually an economy revolving around that currency, I’m going to use 2 examples of free to play games with a ingame economy one from mobile (Candy crush) and one from PC (Team Fortress 2)
Mobile economy (Candy Crush):
Mobile economy usually run like this, You give us $1 we give you 5 extra lives with no return.
Or you can spend 10 for some bombs to help you through the level again no return.
PC economy (Team Fortress 2):
You can pay $2.45 for a key that you can either open a crate with and have a chance of quadrupling your input of 2.45, or trade it for metal and use that to buy more valuable items.
Anytime you want you can sell your items on our market for money so you can buy games through steam.
I use to be a Team Fortress 2 trader myself and I put at least $50 into the game then I cashed out for $200 worth of games.
Mobile game in-app purchases is like throwing money into a black hole,
While putting money into PC games with a solid economy is like putting money in a bank and collecting interest.
Now I will admit that not all PC games will give you return on your money, most of them don’t but there are a few that you can make some return with.
CC – Zack Young 2014
1: Wireless internet
An older lady approaches to the tech center desk carting an armful of electronics, she drops off a desktop computer, laptop and a printer. She then promptly leaves and comes back with a bag of wires and an internet router, again she dumped it all on the desk and leaves. Then she comes back carrying a 32 inch flat screen TV. She puts the TV on the floor and says to me,
“It’s not working” Confused and unsure of what she meant I ask her what the problem is.
She replies with, “I can’t get the internet box working” Still confused I dig into the bag of wires and pull out the router along with a home phone tangled in the routers cables.
I plug the router in and run a quick wifi test on her laptop and everything check in fine.
I say to to the lady, “Everything is working fine, I’m not sure what your problem is”
She responds with “Hey, whats that white thing coming out of that blue box?”
I reply, “It’s a power cable for your router, the internet won’t work without it.”
The lady with a look of confusion on her face says, “Wait, I though it was a wireless router.”
I pack up the all of her electronics and bid her a good day.
2: Laptop battery:
A man who recently purchased a laptop though the tech center came over to the tech desk, he says to me, “This battery is dead, I need a new one” I inquire about why he is back so quickly and he tells me it was just using it and it all of a sudden turned off.
I grab a laptop power cable from under the deck and plug the laptop in and turn it on.
The man looks at me confused and asks, “What is that thing you plugged in there?”
I answer saying that it’s a power cable that re-charges the laptop battery.
The man says, “Ohhhh! I though that laptop battery was like a AAA battery”
He then asks for me to print off a sheet of instructions for charging the laptop, I give him a paper with instruction on it and he goes on his way.
3: Printer ink:
An older woman comes in with a low end printer that she recently purchased and says to me, “I’d like to return this, it isn’t printing properly” So I offer to take a look at it, I run an ink test and the printer prints off the test page perfectly. I ask her why she thinks it isn’t working properly. She replies with, “It doesn’t print in white”
Trying not to laugh I explain that printers don’t print In white because they use white paper.
After this she leaves mumbling on her way out, “These people are idiots, they don’t know anything”
(Clarification: Only high end $4000 photo printers print in white. Not low end $75 printers
And no she wasn’t using black paper)
Type One: The Normal
This selfie is the most common selfie you will see, it usually is a front facing picture of 2-7 people all looking happy. Boring I know eh.
Type Two: The Derp
This selfie is called the derp for a reason.People take derp selfies to show they are in a silly mood, or to show that they have mental issues. The most common type of derp selfie is the “Duck Face” where the person will push their lips out to make it seem they look like a duck. Unfortunately human lips don’t go out 2 inches from their face, so they just look really weird instead of looking like a duck.
Type 3: The background matters (kind of)
This one fascinates me, a person or persons will take a selfie in an odd location such as a public bathroom, back seat of a car, drivers seat of the car (usually on the highway) or in a bedroom.
The reasoning behind this is beyond me, apparently taking a picture of yourself in a bathroom is ‘cool' and 'popular'…
Type 4: A picture with an inspirational quote
This one is an odd one. People will take a selfie and put like 100 filters on it THEN add an “inspirational” quote to it. This makes the selfie a absolute masterpiece that should get at least 50+ likes on Facebook. Yes this method can be applied to bathroom selfies. (Unfortunately)
If the picture doesn’t get 50+ likes obliviously everyone hates you.
Type 5: Famous Object selfies
Picture this in your head, there is a photo of the Eiffel Tower, a normal person just takes a picture of it. But selfie takers have a new twist on this one, they take a picture facing towards themselves with their head right in front of the object that is suppose to be the main focus of the photo.
My only assumptions is that they do this to show that they are the center of attention and nothing else in the picture matters. Not even the famous object in the background.
And that has been guide to the 5 most common selfies!
Hope you enjoyed it.
(Please don’t kill me female race)